Working from a state of fight or flight throughout the year!

A few posts ago I shared with you why I started this blog. As much as I want to keep this space to be something that gives you a sense of peace and relief when reading through by reminding you to be present and be in the moment now, by simply breathing in bringing your awareness to the moment now and everything you do, I feel that it’s also important to share the not so light moments and thoughts with the hope that it’s more relatable and also circles back to why anyone writes in the first place, as a process of releasing and healing.

A year prior to when my health issues began, I had a strange year where at the time it felt like it was one of the best years of my life as well as the worst years of my life. The best year because I was living where I wanted to live, I loved where I lived, I loved my job and I had incredible people around me and nothing to really complain about. It was a very comfortable life and in a materialistic sense and in the wording a lot of people conventionally use, I was stable and secure mostly. Beyond that I was also present and grateful. The worst year was just in terms of having a lot of bad news come to me through out the year and experiencing a lot of losses of losing loved ones, one after another. I did understand that it’s a part of life and apart from the pain I was feeling it was also tough to see the people close to them who are dear to me going through their pain and grief. Not being able to be there for them in anyway for support or even just be around  as I was away from home at the time, felt quite powerless and it was heartbreaking. The illusion of control I had in mind at the time simply disappeared when you realise you actually have no control over anything in life.  

It was the first time in adult life, that I was confronted with choices that really had no right or wrong choice. Now in hindsight I’m aware that there is no right or wrong, it’s just dependant on our perception or the lens we view world through that makes it right or wrong or good or bad. It’s simply a social or learnt construct in our minds. At the time I wasn’t quite aware and it’s the first time I really wished life came with a guide or a handbook with what to do in each or at least some situations.

The thing about losing someone or dealing with losses is that if you allow it, it’s a wake up call to see reality for what it is. I did not do a great job in dealing with the pain, I simply kept myself as busy and distracted as much as I can so that I didn’t have to deal with my emotions and allow my body to feel the pain. Now looking back I can clearly see how that eventually spiralled into the beginning of my health issues. The longer I went with this pain that I was not acknowledging, (in order to release the pain you have to first acknowledge it, allow it to come up, which means you have to feel it and sit with the pain so you can actually release and let go.) it just built up stress in my body and my body was merely working from a state of fight or flight throughout the year.

In this state, our mind and body are more focused on survival and it’s constantly watching out for us trying to ensure we are safe. So our body is always ready for battle or to run away from danger. This is why when one is stressed (physically, chemically or emotionally), the blood sugar increases in the body as it provides more energy in case of any physical harm, and the high blood sugar also inflames the body which is why your cholesterol levels may also increase as the inflammation increases and you may have some damaged tissues. This all together causes the blood to thicken which is why the blood pressure increases in order to help with the flow of blood once it’s thickened. In this stress mode of the body, more blood is pumped to your arms and legs so you can fight or flight, and as the digestion and other repair mechanisms of the body is not perceived important in this time as much as survival, the blood flow to the gut and other repair systems of the body is reduced or completely shut down.

At a time of actual, real, danger this is needed and is an incredible process of the body to help us survive. But as this process is activated merely in the perception of stress, if you are stressed emotionally, physically, or chemically either with work, with your relationships or by the food and medicine you in take that are chemical stressors to the body, and in life in general, you are unconsciously living in a state of stress all throughout your day and maybe for months or for years on end which means your body simply cannot function regularly and repair itself or regenerate cells as it's meant to. Hence why we are sick.  

 To clarify, I did not have my sugar levels increase or cholesterol increase but my gut was completely weak that I had other diseases which I talked about in the previous post “Why I'm even writing the blog in the first place!” manifest in the physical form in my body. This is why if you have any symptom may it be something we consider very minute, like a headache, allergies, digestion issues stemming from feeling bloated, fatigue, hair loss, skin issues, aches in your body, chronic illnesses, even the flu or fever every few days or weeks, maybe stop ignoring them. They may not seem significant right now or it may not be affecting your daily life as badly and maybe it’s become normalised that it’s now a normal part of your daily life, but the longer you go ignoring them, the body is going to keep deteriorating.

The symptoms I listed are simply stepping stones and even if it doesn’t manifest in a worsened state now, you are still living in pain which is now normalised pain and we are not even aware that it’s a form of suffering. The medicine we take to help with these symptoms that are caused by the stress in the first place, are chemical stressors to the body themselves. This is why you don’t find medicine to be a cure but simply relieving the symptoms temporarily or simply prolonging other worse conditions manifesting down the line.

I urge you to take a look at your life to see what your stressors are and maybe acknowledge them, and practice being more present, because when you are in the present moment, stress does not exist. Take a deep breath in for 3 seconds, hold the breath for 4 seconds, and let it go for 5 seconds. Be here in the moment now. All the stressors, just like the breath, simply envision letting go. Or better yet, actually let go! :)

Image credits: @thelankan_globetrotter